When you push to control your chid’s behaviour before managing your own anger, your sending the signal of ‘I’m out of control, you need to change so I can feel better’.
Of course, no parent wants to go from zero to 100, it is for the most part unintentional and like I said, an automatic response. The best way around this is- acknowledging what’s going on, understanding how important it is to get control—and ultimately gaining control of ourselves.
Here are some things I’ve found to be helpful for parents when I work with them.